stability

I’d be okay if I were stable, but I’m not stable.

I’m taking medication for ADHD that will inherently and purposefully affect my personality and emotional expressions, but more than that I am a sufferer of Depression and so in those low extremes it takes much less to drop me too far.

To take into consideration Borderline Personality Disorder: any pressure, of any kind, from those that surround me result in my being instantly affected by them, their expressions and their attitudes towards me.

I can’t seem to hold myself up properly and the ecstatic experiences are offset by considered drops.

I need to start running again in an attempt to normalise my dopamine because it’s that or talking to my psychiatrist about it and no.

I’ve lost everything radiant about myself and I’m sick of being that susceptible to everyone else. I’m sick of my instability. I’m sick of the ease at which I drop off.

I need to stop relying on others, but then again how much of that is simply extraversion.

♪: marina and the diamonds, melanie martinez